I was 5.  I woke up and there was a dark thing standing near my desk.  It seemed to move from side to side and was floating in the air.  I thought that if I didn’t move it wouldn’t see me so I lay there frozen, eyes glued to this apparition.  My heart was beating fast, I was sure that death was near.  Now, if I could just switch on the light, I would face this monster.  Slowly, I reached over to the lamp being careful not to move my legs or make a sound.  Click, I turned on the light to face this apparition head on.  What did I see but a blouse and pants folded over my desk chair.

Our perspectives color life.  Like my fear of the imaginary monster, we can often make life really scary just by how we look at it.  I’ll give you an example.  Jill is out of a job and she is scared because she has two months until her unemployment runs out.  She frightens herself by imagining that she will be a bag lady on the street.  Her image of herself is so clear that she can visualize the cardboard box where she will be living.  You can imagine how she must feel given this thought.  She is terrified and her job search isn’t particularly productive. 

Jo has the same situation but she feels certain that she will get a job and knows that no matter what happens that she is resourceful enough to make a great living.  With these powerful beliefs under her, Jo is more productive and happier.  Which one of these women will most likely land a job?  Well, Jo of course!  Employers will see her energy and want Jo to be a part of their team.  Jo also feels better about herself with this attitude and will land a better job as a result.

We all get stuck in ruts at times.  Our perspective is skewed and we don’t feel good.  That’s what makes us human. Right?  In times like this, it’s a good idea to have some tools in hand to help us to find comfort in any situation. 

Here are some questions to ask yourself when you’ve scared yourself into a rut.

1. What is the evidence for this?
2. What are the odds of this really happening or being true?
3. What is the worst thing that could happen? How bad is worst? What would I do if that happened?
4. What can I do now to change the situation?

Now get into action.  Once you’ve been objective about the situation and have outlined some plans for action…it puts you in the drivers seat.  Your beliefs are like the fuel in a car and your actions get you to where you want to go.

My challenge to you is to design your own program to get out of a rut.  When you notice that you are scaring yourself with your own thoughts, what works best for you?  The tools above will help you to challenge these beliefs.  What other activities help you to clear your head and feel good?  Can you create a program specifically designed for those times when you have frightened yourself into a rut?