-  If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
 -  I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, “where’s the self-help section?”  
    She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
 - Why do they lock gas station bathrooms?  Are they afraid someone will clean them?
 - One nice thing about egotists: they don’t talk about other people.
 - Why do they call hemorrhoids, hemorrhoids … and not asteroids?