You're A Loser!
A prediction. I won't win the Powerball jackpot this year. Neither will you.
You probably agree that I won't win. But you still think you've got a shot at it. Trust me. I'm right.
I've been 100 percent right predicting people who wouldn't win the jackpot. I'm 50-50 for predicting winners.
Years ago, at the start of the Colorado Lottery, I told the guy who did my taxes back then that he could have the second million from the lottery, but the first one was mine. I didn't win the first million. But he won the second one. As far as I know, he still gets $1,000 each week from the lottery.
I'm happy for him, sort of. Well, green with envy actually.
And I still think it was rude of the lottery to give my million to someone else. They don't agree.
Why the predictions? One can't help but notice every New Year that Nostradamus, the most famous astrological predictor of all, gets more press coverage than all other "in" astrologers combined – and more coverage than the legendary
real Santa Claus or that perennial favorite, Father Time, although Santa's press coverage is more positive.1
The Best Revenge is My Success
I'm making as many predictions as possible so I'll be famous in 500 years or so. Can't wait to see my press clippings in 2507.
It could happen. The first printing of Nostradamus' books in the 16th Century totaled fewer than 100 copies each. He made it big on word of mouth - the 16th Century equivalent of press coverage. He was so popular that visitors came to his salon from near and far and he made a fine living for years entertaining them and predicting that they too would not win the lottery.
If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
W. C. Fields, American Comic and Actor, 1880-1946
I'm building my salon now. Drop by any time. I predict you won't show up.
A couple more predictions, since I'm on a roll.
If you talk to reporters, at least one of them will ask you to play Nostradamus sometime this year. Reporters love to get people to make predictions or speculate about what might happen in hypothetical situations. And if you are studying your press coverage trends with a good measurement program, you may even think you know what is going to happen in the future.
You'll be very popular with reporters if you take them up on their invitations to make predictions. But your boss and/or clients won't like it – or shouldn't.
One final prediction: If you're still buying lottery tickets in 2507, you'll be a winner, in more ways than one.
1Print and online press coverage from Google News and Factiva, 12/15/2006 through 1/10/2007.
Jerry Brown is no Nostradamus, but he's a former journalist and seasoned PR professional who brings a practical, results-oriented approach to helping clients get their story heard, understood and remembered. Check out his free weekly ezine, the Monday Morning Media Minute. Or you can reach him at email@example.com / 303-781-8787.
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